Losing your life savings on cryptocurrency is an opportunity for Brexit

Messages from the archives of Rutherford Hall, critical communications strategist

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WhatsApp for Jules: Are you good at digital currencies? We have a new client, crypto exchange Wampa, and all I know about it is money laundering and Ponzi schemes, so I may need another chair on this account.

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WhatsApp for Jules: It does not matter; that’s still more than i know. They are concerned about the UK’s new regulatory pressures, so part of our strategy is to emphasize that cryptocurrency is a Brexit opportunity.

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WhatsApp for Jules: Right, the right to lose your life savings in minutes is a Brexit growth opportunity. But let’s work on the text of it!


From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Evian, great to work with you. May I also introduce my colleague Jules (cc-d), who leads our Advanced Technologies department. As you say, this is a crucial moment. The FCA can’t wait to regulate the industry and apparently Sam Fried-Mybank has made it all difficult for us.

BTW, you always said in public that you would welcome regulations. Can I check if you mean that?

Hi Rutherford

Member of the DCMS panel on business and the metaverse

Find me on Strava, KoM Sydenham Hill, PR London to Brighton 3h 59m


From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

OK, that’s what I assumed. We are already activating our contacts in the Treasury and we see two approaches. First, level the resistance to the regulation of the Financial Conduct Authority.

The Tories want to present Britain as a crypto hub, although hardly anyone knows what that means. Post-Brexit they want to show that the UK is still at the cutting edge of new financial services, so we will argue that an EU-style regulatory stifle will force this industry to move to where it is now.

But there is another approach in which we seem to accept reasonable controls by drawing a distinction between good and bad regulations. The truth is that there is actually one guy at FCA who understands the industry and only works part time. There is a limit to what they can achieve without our help and in the current turmoil there may be business value in calling ourselves FCA authorized.

Good regulation could be some stricter rules on advertising. It doesn’t seem to have hurt the gambling. I’m not sure saying “please invest responsibly” at the end of the ad will seriously hurt the bottom line. Obviously we don’t want tobacco riders like: “Investing in cryptocurrencies means you may never see your money again”. Or “Investments can go up or down, but probably down, possibly within a week”.

Bad regulation would stifle investor protection rules such as adequate UK presence, 1:1 reserves on stablecoins, proof of assets, non-commingling of funds, regular auditing, all those dead-hand Brussels-type controls. This level of interference would kill the UK as a global hub for digital finance and betray the promise of Brexit.

Ministers need to question why they would stop British citizens from investing with us here through an exchange backed by some of our best-loved pop stars and footballers. So the aim is to look like a bank but be regulated like a bookie.

Don’t worry, you won’t have to come to London, you can chat with them on Zoom. Better yet, invite them to Anguilla for pizza.

Yes, of course, I will be happy to communicate via Telegram in the future. Or for maximum security we could always fly to you. . .

Hi Rutherford

Member of the DCMS panel on business and the metaverse

Find me on Strava. . .

Telegram to Evian: Hey Ev, it’s interesting that you already have to be registered for money laundering purposes anyway, but I’m worried that just saying we’re registered with the FCA might blow them away. It’s great that you’re looking at figurines for your campaign, but I’m not sure Boris Johnson and Matt Hancock give off the right vibe. We want someone who screams soothingly, not someone who can devour a kangaroo’s anus.

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WhatsApp for Jules: When we see the guys from Downing Street, let’s just keep emphasizing the UK as a crypto hub. Don’t they want to support a financial industry so cutting edge that its primary operating entity is registered on an island in the metaverse? Also discuss nanny-statism. Only a socialist government would interfere with the freedom to give money. And why would we want to stifle a stock market that offers 28 percent interest on property? You use the term “stablecoin” a lot. I know the founder of one of them is now on the Interpol red list, but it sounds reliable.

Telegram to Evian: Yes, I think we are making progress. That’s a very generous offer and I’m a big fan of stablecoins. Unfortunately, for tax reasons it is easier for us to settle our bills in pounds or dollars. Regulators, huh?

Messages found by Robert Shrimsley

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